Andy Rooney says,
"As I grow in age, I value older women
most of all. Here are just a few reasons why."
An older woman will never wake you in the middle of the night to ask, "What are you
thinking?" She doesn't care what you think.
An older woman knows herself well enough to be assured in who she is, what she is,
what she wants and from whom. Few women past the age of 50 give a damn what you
might think about her.
An older single woman usually has had her fill
of "meaningful relationships and "commitment." The last thing she
needs in her life is another dopey, clingy,
whiny, dependent lover!
Older women are dignified. They seldom have a screaming match with you at the opera,
or in the middle of an expensive restaurant. Of course, if you deserve it, they
won't hesitate to shoot you if they think they can get away with it.
An older woman has the self-assurance to introduce you to her women friends. A
younger woman with a man will often ignore even her best friend because she doesn't trust
the guy with other women. Older women couldn't care less.
Women get psychic as they age. You never have to
confess your sins to an older woman. They always know. An older woman looks good
wearing bright red lipstick. Once you get past a wrinkle or two, an older woman is far
sexier than her younger counterpart. Her libido's stronger, her fear of pregnancy
gone.
Her experience of lovemaking is honed and reciprocal and she's lived long enough to know
how to please a man in ways her daughter could never dream of. (Young men, you have
something to look forward to.)
Older women are forthright and honest. They'll tell you right off if you are a jerk
or if you are acting like one. Yes,
we praise older women for a multitude of reasons.
Unfortunately, it's not reciprocal. For every stunning,
smart, well-coifed babe of 70 there is a bald, paunchy
relic in yellow pants making a fool of himself with some
22 year old waitress.
Ladies, I apologize for all of us. That
men are genetically inferior is no secret. Count your blessings that we die off at a far
younger age, leaving you the best part of your lives to appreciate the exquisite woman
you've become, without the distraction of some demanding old man clinging and whining his
way into your serenity."
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