I stepped out of the shower
And got a good look at myself

Pot belly bald head
Man I thought it was somebody else

I caught my reflection in the mirror
On the back of the bathroom door

And I just don't look good naked anymore

So I'm going upstairs to turn The bathroom mirror to the wall
I hung it there when I was trim and tall

I'd stand there smile and strut and flex
Until my arms got sore

But I just don't look good naked anymore

Well I use to go out with the girls
I loved them one and all

Now they don't get very close to me
They're afraid that I might fall

Well, I went to the doctors
For my annual medical exam

Stood there in the buff
Suddenly he said, "Man!"

I said, "What is it Doc? Some fatal disease?
I just gotta know the score

He said, "No, you just don't look good naked anymore

Well me and my wife had a dance routine
Everybody said it was unique

Now it's only when we're back to back
That we're dancing cheek to cheek

Well I went to a nude beach for a little seaside fun
Stretched out in my birthday suit soaking up the sun

Somebody yelled, "Hey!
There's an old white whale washed up on the shore!"

I just don't look good naked anymore

Now my arches fell, my chest went to hell
And my butt's a draggin the floor

And I just don't look good naked anymore

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Don't worry, you'll still look good even when they tell about you.
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8/9/05