BS # 6
Homocidal Goldfish

Lake Superior in Duluth is experiencing a little trouble lately. All the boaters have been aquainted with a large Walleye fish named Old Bessy, but  something tragic happened. Here's where the story begins:
Little Fluff E. Sowner was the owner to a goldfish named Fluffy. But, Fluffy was no ordinary goldfish. She was a T-bone steak with peanutbutter on it lover. That's all she would eat, was T-bone smothered in Skippy peanutbutter. But, Fluffy's T-bone steak habit was costing way too much, and Fluff E. Sowner couldn't afford it anylonger, so she flushed it.
The sanitary crew down by Lake Superior wasn't smart enough to catch Fluffy, so she got into Lake Superior. There's a chemical down at the bottom of Lake Superior called Chemical Fluffinizer and that creates waves that enlarge goldfish named Fluffy. Well, Fluffy had to prove her name to be Fluffy by how many push-ups she could do. And, it happened.
They believed she was Fluffy and they enlarged her at the Chemical Fluffinizer Committee House. And, Fluffy grew to 30 feet long and 6 feet wide. She was one big Fluffy!!! Well, the tale of Old Bessy floated ashore today, Tuesday, August 35th, 1787, and all the fisherman decided to hunt Fluffy down! They sent out search parties, and everything...and soon, the fish was caught. They put her in Aquarium Prison near Lake Superior so people could stare at her and glare... showing her frying pans and everything else to scare her. Before she was "fried" they asked her for her last words. All she managed to say was "glub glub, glub glub".
This has been a special report from Reporter Naught Cule. Good night...