It’s the most fattening time of the year
With that pumpkin pie filling

and everyone swilling down eggnog and beer

It’s the most fattening time of the year

It’s the lip smackingest season of all
While your shopping you’re cheating
impulsively eating that junk at the mall

It’s the heav-heaviest season of all

There’ll be turkeys for basting

and stuffing for tasting

and giblets and gravy will flow

There’ll be cookies that mom baked

and leftover fruit cake from a christmas a long time ago

It’s the scale flattening time of the year

While your diet you’re blowing
There’s calories going straight down to your rear

It’s the scale flattening time of the year

There’ll be after meal dosing
and arteries closing

Cholesterol levels will grow
It’s too cold to go jogging
To brisk for tobogganing
So pass me a hot buttered roll



It’s the most fattening time of the year

All those gingerbread shingles and

Chocolate Chris Kringle’s will tremble in fear

It’s the most fattening time,

It’s the belt loosening time,
It’s the most fattening time of the year

12/23/05